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Dios y las madres

Dios estaba muy ocupado en crear a las madres, llevaba ya seis días trabajando horas extraordinarias, cuando un ángel se le presentó y dijo: Te afanas demasiado Señor.

Entonces Dios le contestó: Acaso no has leído las especificaciones que debe llenar esta criatura: Tiene que ser lavable de pies a cabeza, pero sin ser de plástico; llevar 180 piezas movibles, todas reemplazables, funcionar a base de café negro y de las sobras de la comida, poseer un regazo que desaparezca cuando se ponga de pie, un beso capaz de cubrir todo, desde una pierna rota, hasta un amor frustrado, y seis pares de manos…

Y el ángel confundido observó: ¿Seis pares de manos? ¡Eso es imposible! no son las manos el problema (agregó el señor), sino los tres pares de ojos.

¿Y eso es para el modelo normal? (inquirió el ángel) El Creador asintió: Uno para ver a través de la puerta siempre que pregunte: «¡Niños! ¿qué andan haciendo allá adentro?» aunque ya lo sepa muy bien, otro detrás de la cabeza para ver lo que más le valiera ignorar, pero que precisa saber, y desde luego, los de adelante, para mirar a un niño en apuros y decirle, sin pronunciar siquiera palabra: «Ya te entiendo hijo, y te quiero mucho».

El ángel le tiró de la manga y advirtió mansamente: Vale más que te vayas a la cama Señor, mañana será otro día.

-No puedo. Y además me falta poco.

Ya hice una que se cura por si sola cuando enferma, que es capaz de alimentar a una familia de seis personas con sólo medio kilo de carne molida, y de persuadir a un chiquillo de nueve años para que se esté quieto bajo la ducha.

Lentamente el ángel dio la vuelta en torno a uno de los modelos maternales.

Me parece demasiado delicada (comentó con un suspiro).

-¡Pero es muy resistente! (aseguró Dios emocionado) no tienes idea de lo que es capaz de hacer y sobrellevar.

¿Podrá pensar?

-¡Claro! y también transigir. Por último el ángel se inclinó y pasó un dedo por la mejilla de la modelo… ¡Tiene una fuga! -No es una fuga, es una lágrima.

-¿Y para qué sirve?

-Para expresar gozo, aflicción, desengaño, pesadumbre, soledad y orgullo.

¡Eres un genio Señor! Y Dios con perfil de tristeza observó: Yo no se la puse…
Tomado del libro «Agenda del ama de casa».

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